What I've Learned Part 2

With family weekend, homecoming, and fall break all around the same time, I've been thinking a lot about my family.  There are fundamental importances of being with your family and loving them more than anything.  They really do take precedence over all.  There is a specific feeling that cannot be achieved unless you are with your family: complete solace and security.  The other day I was feeling sick (being sick at college without family may be the worst feeling in the world), and I called my dad, and was just on the phone for 40 minutes talking about how much I missed home and wanted to be there. He told me something I will never forget. He said "Madi, just because you are far from home, and a step closer to being independent and not needing me anymore, I am still behind you in everything you do. Don't think for a second that I am not here for you."  This made me feel so much better. Getting bogged down with bills and dishes and living on my own it is so reassuring to hear that your parents still support and love you no matter what happens. 

During family weekend, my parents flew out here, and my brother (who works in Dallas), drove out to come visit.  We all stayed in a hotel together and it felt like home again.  I am definitely a home body and I cannot stand being away from family or home for a long period of time.  Since it's only my brother and me, and I'm the baby, I was the last to leave for college.  My mom always refers to us being together as "her chicks in the nest", and she feels the best in this state. When we were in the hotel, it was like there was nothing else in the world. We all forget about the stresses of our daily lives and work loads, and just relax. We don't have to be doing anything to have a great time. We lay around and talk or watch a movie, and we could not be happier. 

I happened to be watching my parents and how they interact together, and found it so entertaining. I believe that since my brother and I have left home, they have spent so much more time together, that it has brought them even closer than before (they have always been extremely close).  My favorite thing about my parents is how goofy they are all the time. They still have inside jokes from when they met at the age of 15 in high school.  They are by far my favorite couple.  There not only is so much love between them, but they are also truly best friends. I laugh at them because when they get invited to parties at friends' houses, they always groan about how they'd rather sit at home with each other. I tell them they aren't social enough, all in good fun, and they always respond with a chuckle and a response such as "I don't need any other friends, I have my best friend right here."  I love the fact that they are so content with each other, that they don't need anything or anybody else to fulfill their "fun" card in life.  They truly only want to spend time with each other. It astounds me that people who have been married for 30 years and knew each other for many years prior to their marriage, never tire of each other's presence.  

The reason I am writing this blog is to show what I have learned from them. There was one particular instance that occurred over family weekend that made me realize how valuable they are to me.  I was doing homework on my laptop at the desk in our hotel room, and I looked up to see them laughing hysterically.  I removed my earbuds and listened.  My mom had said she felt like some decaf (they literally make decaf coffee every single night), and my dad had gotten up extremely quickly to go make it for her. She leaped off the hotel bed to race him to make both the coffees. This is a common event that takes place in our house. Every night when it is time for decaf, they both jokingly argue and fight over who gets to make the other one coffee.  Watching my mom struggle to get past my 6'3" father simply to do something nice for him was so comical to me, because they still act like children. They are so in love, that they "mock fight" over who gets to do something nice for the other one.  This event occurs so often, I almost forgot how meaningful it is to me.  The simplicity of this action makes it so powerful. I realized that it doesn't matter what you're doing for you loved one, as long as you always want to do it. If you have someone in your life who wants to fight you to make coffee for YOU, don't ever let them go.  I've known from a young age that my parents are perfect for each other, but seeing this and thinking about it so recently has reminded me of what love really is.  Love isn't what it appears to be in books and poems, it is something you simply cannot define. It is racing and fighting each other to make the other one a cup of coffee every night. It is never getting bored of the other person's presence. It is sitting at home on the couch watching your favorite TV show with someone. It is listening when the other person has had a bad day.  It is holding your tongue if it will cause a fight.  It is unconditional. 

I know it seems cliche to write a blog about the meaning of love, but it really is what I have learned and seen so recently. I can only hope that one day I will be with someone who fights me to make me coffee every evening.  I hope I can be the kind of partner that my parents are for each other. In my eyes, their love is the strongest I've ever seen, and I pray that I can someday accomplish what they have.